A broken heart that shattered a mother’s love
Last Saturday, I attended an exhibition at an art gallery which left me appreciating the talents we have in arts. The most impressive of the collections I saw was one entitled “A Mother’s Love”. The serenity of a mother’s love was exquisitely captured beyond imagination.
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I have since tried to juxtapose the art-work with a story that made the news headlines a couple of weeks ago about a 40-year-old mother suspected of killing her own daughters aged six and eight.
A professional accountant from Essikado in the Sekondi-Takoradi Metropolis, the mother is reported to have mixed a poisonous substance with some beverage and given it to the girls. Unfortunately, they both died in their sleep.
Broken heart
According to the story published in the Daily Guide newspaper of November 3, 2015, the woman, Naana Amenenah, is believed to have suffered a “broken heart” which had left her mentally unstable.
She probably would have been a broken woman if she gave her all to a relationship that went nowhere. However, it beats imagination that a mother would substitute her love for her adorable children to the extent of killing them. Why would an intelligent working mother capable of providing for the children go to the extent that this woman went? What must have happened to that tender care and love of a mother?
The story is difficult to take in, especially where, according to the newspaper report, a neighbour claimed there was no indication of a previously disturbed person. The neighbour, who confirmed the tragic news of the death of the children to journalists, indicated under anonymity that “the woman took good care of the children and made sure that they were always clean and looking good.” The neighbour added that the mother was particular about the education of the girls and made sure that they always attended school.
Detached relationships
So if the woman showed so much closeness to her girls, what must have triggered what she did to them? Was this neighbour talking as one looking in from a distance or as a close neighbour? Where were her friends? Does she have any family apart from the girls?
Did she have faith-believing friends? Was she close to anyone at work? Did she show any signs of a shattered woman that nobody cared enough to see?
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Tragic stories of this nature paint a picture of a society where members no longer live as each other’s keeper. Whether in neighbourhoods, at the workplace where people spend a greater part of their day, or sometimes even at church where believers are enjoined to “love their neighbours as themselves”, we are not getting closer to one another.
Emotional disturbance
Where a person is emotionally disturbed, certainly in the family, among friends, in the neighbourhood, at the workplace, church or mosque, someone would notice some signs and raise concern. In the case of the woman, at the workplace where she was the accountant, did anybody ever have cause to suspect that something was indeed amiss emotionally? Did she not have any friends at the work place?
How was her performance at work over a period, especially the period leading to the alleged poisoning of her daughters? These are legitimate questions to ask because in a good working environment, a change in the performance of an employee at that level would call for probing and counselling, especially if the change in performance is sudden and becomes disruptive.
The same could be said about our impersonal attitudes as members of communities. We no longer look out for our neighbours as was done in times past. We have grown suspicious of neighbours because we live in times of mistrust.
Many women are living with the ungratefulness of men they once made their all in all. They suffer abuse and humiliation on a daily basis to the extent of losing their self-worth.Unfortunately, we have gravitated towards a life of “me and mine only”, a life so detached that it becomes difficult for anyone to approach anybody for help.
I believe there is more to it for a woman to end her love and tender care for her children in such a tragic manner. We need to start picking up the broken pieces in our families, relationships and communities and get a bit closer to one another than what we are doing these days.
The tragic end to the short lives of the Essikado girls could have been avoided if there was someone close to the family. Regrettably, that kind of tragedy is symptomatic of the life we have adopted for ourselves as members of any community.