Ways women soften and improve their men
In most cases, when I see a man finally get into a serious relationship with a woman, the man only improves. Women—good women—have a way of softening out the rough edges of their partners.
They don’t necessarily try to change their partners because we should never try to change someone’s essence. They just bring out the best in them. Let’s face it: a lot of men just get used to their bachelor life ways.
Advertisement
Nobody came around and told them to clean up their act. Maybe, once in a while, when their moms would visit, they got a talking to about their eating habits and home décor. But, other than that, they were left to their own devices—the wild things that they are. Female partners have a way of just bettering their men—of softening them and improving them. Like this.
They get better at talking to women
Men in long-term relationships tend to get better at speaking to women in general. Before, they may have felt awkward around women and been clunky in conversation. But through getting close to one woman, they learn more about the wants and needs of women overall, and just get better at carrying on conversations with platonic female friends and colleagues.
And they dislike men who can’t
I know my partner has started to be very aware of men who aren’t good at talking to women. More specifically, he notices men who make women uncomfortable and he doesn’t like those men. I even catch him correcting them, and telling them, “Hey, women don’t like when you talk to them like that.” I want to give him a little trophy when he does that.
They’re more in-tune with emotions
Many men become more in-tune with emotions after being with a woman for a long time. In the past, they may have not sat down and tried to analyze their own mood swings and emotional roller coasters. They’d just ride them out, allowing them to destruct their days however they might. But women can teach men to sit down and ask themselves, “Why do I feel this way? What’s a productive way to handle that feeling?”
They learn to love babies and animals
Almost every married man I know is sweet and even enamored with babies and animals now—though he may not have been when he was single. Women are more in-tune with their nurturing side, and are comfortable being affectionate with babies and animals. By being around that, men become that way, too.
They learn a thing or two about women’s fashion
Props to my man who has actually started to understand a bit about women’s fashion. I can ask him what jewelry to wear with something. His notes are valid! One day I was wearing bright pink pants and a top with a busy pattern and he said, “I think you can only wear one stand-out item at a time.” And he was right!
They discover the power of beauty products
My partner used to just get the cheapest bar of soap he could find at the dollar store and clean his whole body and face with that. Maybe he collected body lotions from hotels for free and put them on his face. I introduced him to nice, moisturizing body wash, real face cream, and shave butter. Now he’s obsessed.
They may even get into meditation
Some men become more spiritual when they’re in long-term relationships with women. Women help put them in touch with that side of themselves. I got my partner into meditation, and I have several girlfriends who also got their men into it. These men used to just spiral out of control with anxiety for days, and now they have a coping mechanism.
They see why shows like “Queer Eye” are the best
Real talk: my partner loves reality shows now like “Queer Eye.” If there’s just the right amount of heart-warming moments, paired with some fun attention to fashion and home décor, he’s in. It’s not all sports documentaries for him anymore.
They learn to enjoy just one glass of wine
I know that for a lot of men, drinking is competitive. It’s a marathon. They get together, and just try to chug the most beer they can all night. But, when men get involved with women, they learn to just enjoy one or two glasses of wine with dinner.
They learn to love nature more
I think women may be more in touch with nature—nature is a mother, after all. But it’s important for all of us to get closer to nature. I know many women who’ve gotten their partners more into exploring nature hikes on the weekends, rather than just drinking beer at a sports bar.
They get into things like Farmer’s Markets
I know: it’s the most cliché couples thing. People joke about all of the couples at the Farmer’s Market. But, I think this happens because women want their partners to be more informed on the food that they eat, and to make healthier choices. The Farmer’s Market is kind of a fun way to do that. We talk to the vendors, get recipe ideas, and even try some of the foods in a fun outdoor environment with live music and cute babies everywhere.
They want to stay in more
Men in relationships tend to learn the beauty of just staying in. While, when many of them were single, they were all on a text thread with their boys about where they were going out that night, committed men see how nice it is to be in a quiet place with people you love, rather than a loud one with tons of strangers. And they start applying that to their friendship hangouts, too.
They treat their bodies better
Overall, women have a way of motivating their partners to treat their bodies better. We make them go to bed earlier. Since we split a lot of meals, we have input on what they eat, and we go for the vegetable frittata instead of the ribs and fries tray. We pressure them to go to regular doctor’s appointments.
They learn to prioritize relationships
Men can be all about work, work, work before they meet their soul mate. They believe that life is all about killing the game in their career and making lots of money. When they fall in love, they realize that an intimate relationship is the most rewarding thing, and they slowly shift into an existence that has more work-life balance.
They appreciate all things cute
My partner has almost taken on my vision. He’ll send me photos of things he knows I’ll think are cute, like elderly couples in a salsa dancing group or kids playing in sprinklers. Women have a way of teaching men to appreciate those darling little moments in life.