The Mirror's Health , Lifestyle and Fashion
Life is not vain
Over the years, I have heard many people repeat the statement, “life is vanity.” Is this really true? Because the context where this statement is used is always during loss.
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And that makes me question the veracity of this wrongly used statement. It is commonly said that behavior is the only truth. Then those who profess that life is vain should stop aspiring to do more or get more.
I don’t mean to be philosophical but I dare say life is not vain as it has been peddled. If we don’t say to people at their graduation or their wedding that life is vain, I don’t think it is right to generalise life as a vain venture.
The problem with life is that people don’t often have a barricade for the success they want to have. Most people set out in life with a very vague picture of the life they want to have.
This is the genesis of the wasting of our lives. Do we have regrets in life? Everyone does but that doesn’t make life vain.
Although we are not at the end of our lives, we can boast that at some point in our lives we did some things right. Life is not vain but life can be in vain.
How do I know this? If you can remember some comments which were made about people who are dead, you would realise that life is not vain but can be in vain. Thus, the vanity of life is a choice we make. And this choice is made intentionally or unintentionally.
According to an early psychologist, from age 60 and above, we indulge in an appraisal exercise where we look back over our lives.
According to this psychologist, the outcome of this exercise is either integrity or despair. This theory flaws the long-held notion that life is vain. If life were vain people wouldn’t be happy at the end of their lives.
Some have died smiling whilst some have died terrified. Today I see people from all over the world living in vain because of the things they have chosen to pay attention to.
I have also encountered a lot of people who mean well but realised at some point in time that they were living in vain.
One of the ways alerts of living in vain is when we have bad experiences such as sickness, death of a loved one, loss of a job or a relationship.
I counselled a very nice gentleman who had been diagnosed with diabetes. This man was very hardworking and ambitious. He told me that his life revolved around his work so much that he barely took any day off.
He recounted that even for days he didn’t feel too well, he mustered the strength to get his work done. He went on to further say that this new development (diabetes) was a wakeup call for him because he had not been living right.
Another gentleman after having been advised by his doctor to change his lifestyle after diagnosis rather decided to turn a deaf ear. He was rushed to the hospital another time and when the doctor saw him again, he had developed a life-threatening disease.
When the news got to him, the look on his face accentuated how he had regretted his actions. I can give more stories of how people have to pause and evaluate their lives because of the bad experiences they had.
If life is not vain but can be lived in vain, it is important to consider ways we can be living in vain.
At the beginning of life, less is the reason for more. One would assume that after moving from the “less” status to the “enough” status, life should be lived at a slower pace. Unfortunately, that isn’t the case. Life becomes ironic after a while because enough now becomes the reason for more.
Enough unleashes the realisation that we can achieve anything we want and when care isn’t taken we fall into the bottomless pit of trying to satisfy your needs.
When you dream about your future, don’t forget to dream also about a restful future. Way too many people don’t live to enjoy their labour.
Some either die before retirement or a little while into retirement. Some also contract diseases and use all their retirement days to and from hospitals.
I know some people are destined to sacrifice so others will enjoy and not everybody. We ought to define with concision the future we want to have.
As we do so, we must give allowance for enjoying life in the process and the place of rest. You don’t have to start life with either wrong or vague definition of the life we want to have.
You must have a fair idea of your threshold for the money you’d want to have amongst other things. The most important skill you can ever master is the skill of prioritisation.
Pay attention to the things that matter. Not everything in life is important. The earlier you recognise this the better. It doesn’t have to be too late.