The Merriam Dictionary defines respect as a feeling of understanding that someone is important and should be treated in appropriate ways.
With respect you treat someone in thoughtful ways and therefore avoid treating that someone in rude and disrespectful ways like name calling, insults and demeaning him or her.
Respect is a silent way of expressing your feeling for another. Therefore, if you show respect to your man you show you have some value for him and grow his ego.
Respect is therefore an effective and unspoken way of expressing your love for your man. It is the greatest emotional need of a man. Without respect love is lost and his ego shattered. A man without his ego is a living dead.
In summery if you do not show respect, nothing you do for your man counts. This explains why many men have left women they really loved because these women showed hurtful behaviours and sadly these women had no idea how much they were destroying the ego of their men.
Studies show men leave relationships more than women and disrespect is a major cause to men leaving relationships.
Some ways of showing respect
Trust his judgement. A man feels strongest when his woman affirms his strength, feels wisest when his woman affirms his wisdom but feels most motivated when you respect his decisions.
Your man may not get everything right but if you have to voice your opinion, do so without directly opposing him and challenging his ego.
For example, instead of saying ‘no you are wrong’, positive rephrasing like ‘I was thinking more about.’ will motive your man.
Create an open energy of possibilities instead of shutting him down. If he is adamant give him the benefit of the doubt. Let him have the final say.
He may sometimes get it wrong but he will learn from his mistakes.
Build him up with your words
Your words have the power of life and death and therefore the power to shape your man; you build or destroy him with your words.
In public or private show respect by how you speak to him and about him. Be an affirming, not a sarcastic; be warm not cold; be an encourager not a critic.
Speak to him in loving tones and tell him what you admire about him. Compliment him and show appreciation for everything he does for you, big or small.
Focus on his positives and have his back; at all times and in all situations let him know you respect him because your respect brings the best out of him.
Never be too busy for your man. Show respect by listening to him; stop whatever you are doing and look at him when he talks and refrain from interrupting him. Be interested in what he says and follow his wishes.
Smile at him and laugh at his jokes. He wants to make you happy because he can’t be happy unless he believes he makes you happy.
Don’t mother your man
A woman has a natural instinct which can be directed to her lover. If you attempt to change, discipline or correct your man from the posture of a mother instead of wife or lover, your man feels emasculated and will sense a cycle of frustration in your relationship.
Prioritize what happens in the bedroom
Sex is the second most important emotional need of a man. If you starve your man sexually, in a man’s mind, he thinks you don’t see him as a worthy husband and sees it as a sign of disrespect.
You must therefore always be receptive to your man and in fact initiate sex often. This makes your man respected and fulfilled to meet your needs.
Do you respect your man?
Respecting your man means honouring his dignity and recognizing his inherent worth as a man created to be your leader. Respecting your man does not come easy especially when you think your man is younger, poorer, makes choices you don’t agree and does not earn or deserve your respect.
Marriage has no room for any feminist ideology that respect must be mutual or earned. Your maker commands you to respect your man unconditionally and you are responsible for what God commands you to do. Therefore, avoid treating your man like he is inferior, a child or his opinion does not matter.
Instead value him and treat him honourably. Value his idea, feelings, space or privacy. Value him as a dearly beloved and act like it because respect is the most important thing your man expects from you.
If you grow your man’s ego simply by respecting him, you virtually cast a spell on him and he treats you like his queen and meets all your needs.