The Mirror's Health , Lifestyle and Fashion
Is incest increasing exponentially?
Men are getting their teenage daughters pregnant and fathers are sleeping with their little children in the nursery and primary schools.
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Recently a man with three wives impregnated two of his daughters. A 55-year-old man slept with his six- month- old daughter. Again there is the case of a father who impregnated his three daughters and claims he gave birth to them and raised them and therefore has a right to sleep with them.
In few cases young men are sleeping with their mothers, aunties and mother –in-law. The list goes on and the frightening side is that these reported cases are less than 1 per cent of the situation on the ground.
Again, a 12-year-old active, pleasant girl who was doing very well in the studies, suddenly became quite and withdrawn. Her marks slumped. Her class teacher sensed something was wrong and after a long time of discussions she opened up to say her father had been sleeping with her.
There are many reported cases of incest
This father is very rich and has many girlfriends but had added her daughter to the list. The teacher was advised to report the matter to the police but he never came back. Apparently he did not have the courage to take up the case.
Why incest
Our children activate our early romantic memories. A father sees her daughter as a ‘little wife’ and a wife sees her son as a ‘little husband’. A man is therefore closer to his daughter and a woman is closer to her son.
Unfortunately some men cannot draw a boundary. He sees his little daughter grow breast and getting endowed at her back. He sees her partly naked or provocatively dressed. Men are aroused by what they see and it takes few seconds for a man to be aroused.
Unfortunately when a man is aroused his brain moves from his head and relocates between his legs. He can’t think right again and will go after anyone in skirt and blouse, be a daughter, mother or relative.
This may explain why many think it is the devil that makes them do it.
Some get over their guilty feelings and keep going. There is a case of a father and daughter in a sexual relationship for over 20 years. There is also a case of a brother who has been doing it with her biological sister since infancy and continues to do so even both are married.
It is easy to continue a sexual activity with children or siblings because it may go on unnoticed. It is also convenient when you consider place, time and financial cost. This has happened to many people including pastors, politicians, lawyers, teachers and farmers because ‘body no be firewood.’
Effect of incest
In most cases victims are not stimulated for sex and forcible penetration causes physical damage including aberration of the vagina and coital tear leading to breeding.
In one case the whole genital area was ‘bulldozed’ and the victim needed complete reconstruction and faces the risk of infertility.
Victims of incest have a sense of betrayal, anger, torture, humiliation, guilt and fear that it could happen again. They lose their primary support system and trust in men.
They therefore fear intimacy or sex in marriage. Some lose their inner strength and confidence to optimise their talents.
There is also the risk of pregnancy and abortion. Children born from incest are examples of ‘inbreeding’ and are usually weak physically, emotionally and mentally.
Why victims and wives do not report
Some children keep quiet because their fathers convince them that it is normal for fathers to do this as a sign of love and care.
The father ‘spoils’ her with gifts and affection. He takes her out often and treats her like a queen. Gradually she accepts what is happening and even enjoys it.
Some children do not know whom to trust enough to confide in. They are afraid of what will happen to them or their fathers if others get to know.
Some lure their victims with gifts
In fact in almost all cases abusers deny any wrong doing and relatives accuse the victim as being bad and punish them for daring to make such an allegation.
Some women are too busy to detect something wrong is going on right under their nose. Some do not develop good relationship with their daughters so the children can’t confide in their mothers.
Some get suspicious but quickly brush it aside because they assume this could never happen.
There are also those who know what is happening but are helpless about their situation. They are totally dependent on their husbands and any confrontation could push them out of their matrimonial homes.
Some women do all it takes to keep their marriage even if it means turning blind eyes to the husband abusing their daughters. Some seek the consolation that if their daughters are keeping quiet it means they like what is happening.
Is incest increasing exponentially?
Today COVID-19 infection is spreading exponentially in some countries; that is the rate of infection has become more rapid in proportion to the total growing number. The analogy of rate of infection in these countries would be the rate of incest in Ghana
Our society is decaying and the increasing rate of incest is a microcosm of our undisciplined society where promiscuity is the order of the day.
Listen to how often and ridiculously our radio stations advertise aphrodisiacs. It could encourage some mentally enraged men to turn the heat on their children or relatives.
We need to intensify our war against indiscipline and parental neglect. If your husband abuses your daughter be strong and turn him in.
If you save your innocent daughter even at the risk of your marriage, you become a good model of our fight against crime.
We must all accept the challenge to fight this inhuman act.
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