Graphic Online

Graphic Online 

Breastxhibition

Author: E-mail from Sandra
Breastxhibition

If King Mswati III were to have been present at the just ended Music Awards ceremony, I’m sure he would have been extremely pleased to see how endowed some Ghanaian women are when it comes to the divine mounds on their chests — potent breasts!

Now that I mention him, I might as well tell you a bit about him, just to make a point. King Mswati III is the current king of the Kingdom of Swaziland. He is well-known for hosting the annual traditional reed ceremony held in September or October where he gets to pick a new wife every year.

According to tradition, he can marry his chosen one only after she gets pregnant; until then, they are termed “brides”.

Thousands of unmarried and childless girls and women travel from the various chiefdoms to participate in the eight-day event that celebrates virginity and chastity.

In fact, girls as young as eleven-year-olds are allowed to participate in the ceremony. Barely six months ago, he unveiled his 14th wife, 19-year-old Siphelele Mashwama, daughter of Jabulile Mashwama, a Swaziland cabinet minister.

I don’t know if you’ve ever chanced to see photos of the bare-chested wives of the King – cute, rounded, turgid, gripping, pneumatic, therapeutic and captivating. Huh, by all standards, that King will live long. Just the sight of those divine mounds on the chest of those young women can heal! So were the breasts of some Ghanaian women who were present at the awards ceremony last Saturday.


Gosh! I had the chance to watch videos of the programme forwarded to our old-school Whatsapp group chat by a few shrewd schoolmates of mine. Mehn! Some Ghanaian women have got goodies!

Mind you, I have qualified my description by specifically using the word, “some” because from what I watched on my phone, much as the mammary glands of some attendees were piercingly forward-pointing, others, whether small, medium or large-sized, were flabbily south-bound.

I could feel the weight of the south-bounders dangling on the diaphragm of their owners; sagging helplessly, they seemed to beg for a lifting.

Unfortunately, their possessors had let them on the loose by going braless. Hmm thanks to the abundant yawning v-neckline clothes which were worn!

Some of the clothes were profound v-neck bustiers; others were misguided deep necklines that went all the way through the chest. No amount of strength in the shoulders of their wearers could hold the drooping breasts up.

Heads rolled, fashion statements were made, but as to whether impressions obtained were good or bad, only observers can remain worried. Hahaha.

You see, a neckline is essential for the expected outlook of every dress or costume. It has a way of shaping and bringing out the poise of its wearer. The choice of neckline is dependent on many factors like the shape of the face, shoulders, size of the bust, the bust line, neck type and above all the body shape of the wearer. With this in mind, there are some necklines I never wear; no matter how much I’m made to feel convinced.

The shape, size, position, symmetry, spacing, firmness, and amount of sagging of an individual’s breasts vary considerably. I am busty and heavy at the chest. What business would I have wearing deep v-neck clothes which require one to go braless? Ei, I’ve always been a bold person but I wouldn’t dare dream of pursuing such fashion booboo.

That’s how the bride of a wedding I attended a few years ago got her heavy breasts escaping from the captivity of her bustier gown. They poured out in careless abandon during the exchange of vows. It was so embarrassing; the abashed groom had to strategically hug her immediately whilst signaling the maid of honour to do some magical moves to save the day.

Some of us possess what looks like matured watermelons or sagging “tatale” on our chests and should in no way compare ourselves with the deep-seated and pointed “stand at ease” apples or lemon-sized kinds owned by the wives and brides of the Swazi King.

Anyway, let me leave you now. I want to replay all those videos sent to our group again. I need to admire those whose glands looked like Mswati brides in their v-neck frocks. Enjoy your weekend.

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