We know what first dates can be like: they can be awkward, scary and sometimes you just want to run to the hills like hell!
But sometimes you really want a first date to work out.
He’s hot and you don’t want to blow your big chance to impress him.
Problem is that you’ve been here before.
You’ve lost your track and ran out of things to say.
Periods of awkward silences ensue, and they force you to blab the first things that come to your mind (usually very bad jokes or crude observations that don’t impress him!).
After the date is over, he doesn’t text you. If only you knew what to talk about on a first date!
Knowing what to talk about on a first date isn’t just useful for securing a second date, however.
It also helps you learn more about him so that you can decide if a second date is even worth your time.
Talking about work isn’t something we always want to do, and while it seems like a bit of a mundane subject, it works well on a first date.
Talking about your jobs gives you a chance to talk about your hopes and dreams and what you really want to do for a career.
It gives you both a chance to learn more about each other’s place of work and what your work/life balance is like.
This is important to know – if, for example, he’s a workaholic and you’re not, it’s already clear that this probably isn’t going to work.
Talking about work also means there will be plenty of amusing anecdotes for you to both share, and you can also talk about the positive experiences you’ve had at work, as well as the disastrous bosses you’ve worked for!
This one can seem like heavy subject matter and you definitely don’t want to plunge straight into it.
But if you’ve spent some time properly connecting during the date, there’s no harm in talking about life goals.
Life goals are especially important to discuss to determine if he’s someone you want to spend a good amount of time with.
If his life goals are totally different to yours, there’s no point wasting any more time getting to know him.
That’s why it’s a good idea to broach the subject during the first date.
It also makes for a really interesting conversation.
Hobbies and Passions
“What do you like to do in your free time?” is a classic first date question.
If you literally never ask it, you’re missing a trick.
Everyone has spare time and it’s often what a person does in their spare time that should show us how compatible they are with us.
Talk about Books
If you want to connect with a guy on a deeper level, the best thing to do is to get him talking about books.
More to the point, get him talking about his favourite books.
The books he likes to read will give you an insight into what his intellectual pursuits are – or, indeed, if he even has any intellectual pursuits at all.
Moreover, talking about books can also inspire discussions on the things you both like to read about, and it might turn out that you share similar ideas and theories about philosophy, fiction and so on.
Talk about Values
Talking about values can seem like heavy stuff on a first date. But as mentioned, you don’t want to waste your time on a second date with a guy who isn’t even worth your time.
As such, it’s a good idea to our find as much as you can about the guy on the first date.
And learning what his values are will give you a clearer idea as to how compatible you two really are.
If he shares your values, great.
On the other hand, if his values are at odds with yours, you might need to call it a day at the end of the first date.
When our values don’t match up, there’s no potential for a long term relationship.
Talk about Friends
If you feel comfortable with the guy on the first date, you can start to talk about both your friends.
A lot of us are defined by the company keep, so learning more about who he spends a lot of his time with will give you a better understanding into what he’s like as a person.
You could also find out how much time he spends with his friends – does he hang with his bros every single weekend or will he find time for you?
Talk about your friends too – friends are an interesting subject matter and there’s always a funny story to tell!
Talk about Their Idea of Fun
Everyone has a different idea of fun.
Some people like to read for kicks, some like to let their hair down in bars and nightclubs and others like to jump out of planes!
Everyone likes to have fun and talking about it is a fun conversation to have.
But more than that, it shows you how much fun the two of you will have together.
If his idea of fun is to go to the ball game with his bros while you want to go skiing, the two of you might hit it off.
Funny or Bad Dates
Come on, we’ve all had our fair share of bad dates and it’s totally okay to talk about them on a first date – well, as long as this one isn’t one of those bad dates, that is!
Ask him what’s the worst date he’s ever been on – he’ll definitely have a funny story to share!
Share your funny experiences, too.
Talking about bad dates is a great way to relieve the tension and it can get you both laughing.
It might also show you both that, in comparison to those bad dates, this date you’re on at the moment isn’t so bad at all!