The Christian Woman:Secrets to enjoying your marriage

BY: Caroline Boateng
Secrets to enjoying your marriage


In her introduction, the author, Rev. Patricia Sappor (Rev Pat), sets the tone for her work by acknowledging marriage as God-made, God-ordained and God-enabled.

Created by covenant, marriage, the author adds it, is “designed to bring total joy spiritually, emotionally and physically to both husband and wife, uniting them in a covenant relationship between themselves and their Creator.”

In practice however, many face sorrow and bitterness in their relationships, and the author uses her practical experience in encouraging readers to aim for the utmost heights of bliss in marital relationships, which is how God designed the institution.

Art of Marriage

Describing God’s intended purpose of marriage as a perpetual union of happiness, Rev Pat then delves into the art of marriage.

A close reading of her work would open up for readers, deep insights into the art.

For instance, the art of marriage is understood daily through submission to God, the daily ministration of the Holy Spirit, the study of the word of God and wisely observing and learning from the experiences of others.

The author also teaches that marriage is a course in humility, where one sets aside his or her fixed ways to change daily.

For women, submission is the key given by God in marriages, and although she concedes that submission is difficult, she maintains it is doable with the help of the Holy Spirit.

The Ingredients for Marriage cites love and purpose as the driving force of marriage, while the ingredients are to be found in the driving force.

Breaking into bits her concept for readers, Rev Patricia Sappor goes back to basics and enforces the raison d’être of woman.

The woman was created in the beginning to be a helpmeet, that is, a purposeful assistant, she says.

Having that purpose in mind and with love as the focus, joy, peace, endurance, understanding and respect are the other attributes of marriage, she says.


The Secrets to Enjoying your Marriage unravels the physical, spiritual and financial means by which a wife engages the husband.

At the physical level, innovation in keeping one’s self beautiful while bearing in mind Christian standards of decorum is discussed.

The author emphasises the importance of Christian women endeavouring to stay “hot” for their husbands.

“Longevity in marriage is no licence for complacency, neither is it a guarantee for ‘till death do us part,’ she warns women.

The spiritual means by which a Christian wife engages the husband has its basis in the woman getting in tune with God to be directed appropriately about her lover and family. That, Patricia Sappor says, is achieved by prayer and intercession.

That chapter is replete with biblical examples of women who applied the principles and succeeded.

Financially, a wife’s ability can lessen the pressures on her husband and make her relevant in the financing of kingdom business.

The author however admonishes that a wife’s financial wealth does not negate God’s command for her to submit to her husband.

Art of Management

The Art of Management in Marriage shifts the focus on skills in personal management to ensuring that a wife with a career who is also actively involved in other social activities does not become overwhelmed by the demands of her various roles.

Time management is key in achieving that, while focus, prioritising, planning and managing interruptions are all aspects of ensuring that one is not perpetually overburdened.

A section on investments and guidelines for effective housekeeping ends the chapter.

Waiting and evolving

Rev Pat proposes waiting on God in her short but poignant chapter on Managing Marital Challenges.

When all is said and done, the quality of a wife’s marriage is dependent on the quality of her personal relationship with God.

She assured women that God will continue to show himself in the lives of women who continuously call on him as he did for Esther, deborah and Hannah.  She assured women of the faithfulness of God.”  Likewise, a wife who fails to ensure a sound relationship with the God who created her and her marriage would face heartache.

These are the wise prescriptions in her chapters on Personal Walk with God and Living a Fulfilled Christian Life.

She concludes with a chapter for couples and proposes innovative ways of keeping the spice in a union.


When the last page is turned, a careful reader would have had the feeling of graduating from the Business School of Marriage.

She satiates the mind with innovative but simple principles. For instance, how a wife should invest in assets that would generate sustainable income for the family, rather than buying liabilities, which are items that tend to squeeze money from the buyer in securing its use.

Her language is simple and uncomplicated.

She shares biblical truths practically, and by that endears herself as a writer to all readers.

The book has critical reviews and the endorsements of the Founder of Action Chapel International, Archbishop Nicholas Duncan-Williams; the Senior Pastor, Legon Baptist Church and Author, Minister and Lead Consultant of Legacy & Legacy, Rev. Albert Ocran.


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