Our popular Ghanaian bishop who claims God calls him angel is in the news again. In a video circulating on the social platform, the bishop is heard asking all his church members in all branches of Ghana to bring their used boxer pants, bras and panties to Tema to be burnt in church.
This he claims is a vision God has given Him to take away all problems of his church members including poverty, single life, disease, infertility and all problems in life.
Infertility in marriage
When couples in their reproductive years fail to produce a child after one year of adequate (at least three times in a week), uninterrupted and unprotected sexual intercourse then one or both may have a problem. Women account for 40 per cent of the problems.
Their common problems include inability to produce healthy eggs, blockage of fallopian tubes, fibroid and defective uterus rejecting fertilised egg.
Men also account for 40 per cent of the problems. Their problems include ejaculatory disorders, inability to produce healthy sperms and low sperm count.
The remaining 20 per cent of cases are unexplained or unexpected. Studies also show that 15 per cent of all women will struggle with pregnancy and in the end 10 per cent of women will never make it no matter how badly they may want children.
Sadly, Ghanaian men think they are all fertile and could not be the cause of the problem. A woman goes to the hospital; the doctor clears her and asks to see the husband.
He refuses and boasts he will prove to the woman he is fertile. He then goes in for a girl friend who senses his desperation and gives him a child from somewhere.
He is happy and pushes the blame on his woman. Many wives in their desperation to save their marriages and image simply go out and bring in children.
A man can be covered but not a woman. Some women come in to confess that all their children are not the biological children of their husbands and some live with guilty conscience.
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Effect of infertility
Childlessness is a major underlining cause of most conflicts in marriage. This is because in Ghana children are the focus of marriage and marriage without children may be a bad omen.
In some cultures, marriage without children is not seen as marriage at all and in the past barren women were not given decent burial because they were assumed to have broken a line of lineage.
In childless marriages sex becomes mechanical and unfulfilling. Unfortunately, it is the woman who suffers greatly, even if she is not the problem.
She is under stress, frustration and disappointment. She suffers stigmatisation and may lose her marriage.
In some cases, a man thinks he is being magnanimous if he marries other women to get children.
What to do in childless marriage
Have a positive mental attitude. Fear will worsen your situation. Avoid blame game and team up to find solution. A woman must avoid cheating to bring in children.
You must also avoid juju men and fake pastors who attribute any human problems to evil spirits. Sometime ago a fake pastor claimed that any barren woman who buys his anointing oil will have twins! Fact is he buys 500cm3 oil for four cedis from the market, puts it in 10cm3 bottles and sells each for GH¢200.
This gives him 2,500 per cent profit. Good business but sadly highly educated women are falling for it.
Some women in their desperation strip naked before fake pastors for ‘holy bath’. Body no bi fire wood and some pastors take undue advantage of their desperate condition.
About three years ago a fake pastor in Sunyani claimed that there was a special anointing in his sperms and many desperate women queue for it. Women!
Have regular sex. Keep busy in the morning afternoon and night. This includes the time a woman is in her period.
Fact is contrary to our traditional belief menstrual flow is sterile and does not harm the man or woman. Some women who do not normally have orgasm do so during this time because the clitoris becomes sensitive and easily stimulated.
Some women with short or irregular menstrual cycles ovulate during their period and you must go for the kill if you want children (read my book, Your Guide to Marriage).
Go for medical checkup. You must know the underlying cause to get treated. Avoid local herbs and concoctions that is claimed to solve every problem.
There are cases where the problem comes from the man but the woman is made to drink all kinds of concoctions.
Most of these herbs may worsen your siltation and predisposes you to many diseases. Men must cooperate. Avoid putting pressure on your wife ‘or else.’
Will burning of panties cure infertility?
Unfortunately, today many churches teach that with miracles, breakthroughs, sowing a seed and supernatural blessing you can get anything you want without working for it.
This is a dangerous teaching in a poor country aspiring for development through technology. What we must appreciate is that God does not reward laziness.
He Himself works each day, each time and so must you. Never expect to sow where you do not reap.
If you want to cure infertility take the appropriate medical steps, then pray.
Will burning of panties cure infertility? One thing for sure is that it causes financial loss. If you think it brings prosperity, wait. Time will tell.