I have strange feelings for her

BY: Sebastian Syme

Dear Auntie Betty, I am 16 and in Form One. There is a nice girl in my school with whom I have fallen in love. But I can’t muster courage to tell her I love her.

But I always admire her in class and experience strange feelings when I see her. This is affecting me.

What should I do?

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Wisdom, Kasoa.

Dear Wisdom, It is natural for you to admire and fancy girls at your age and so don’t worry too much about how you feel now. What you should be careful about is how you handle the way you feel.

Do you know you can control that feeling you are experiencing? Yes, you can if you want to. Since this is affecting you negatively, I believe you would want to overcome it. 

   You will have to get yourself busy by reading story books in class when your teacher is not around, so that you can take your mind off her. As much as possible, do not be around her. Make sure you are always in the company of your friends and engage in some competitive games to excite you and whip up the competitive spirit in you and your pals. Gradually, you will no longer feel that way for her.

But you should know that she is not the only girl you may feel that way about. This time it is she, but another time you will feel the same way about another girl. It is, therefore, good to learn to overcome that feeling, so that you do not begin to engage in boy-girl relationships during your teen years.

How can I stop singing?

Dear Auntie Betty, I am 12 and in Class Six. I can’t stop singing in class. Even when there is a teacher in class, I sing and I am always punished for doing that.  When I don’t have anything to do, I  sing. 

What should I do?

Nyamekye, Tema.

Dear Nyamekye, Usually, it is difficult to stop practices that have become habits, but once you are determined to do it, you need to make a conscious effort and also ask your friends to help you achieve your aim. Your friends in your class can draw your attention to it when you start singing in class,  so that you stop. When you begin to fight this problem, sometimes you will unconsciously go on to sing, but if you realise the lapse, you have to stop immediately. 

If you sing in class, you disturb your mates and it is even more serious when you do so while your teacher is teaching. That is disrespectful, so bear that in mind and stop the habit.