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‘Till death do us part’, this is what this happy couple seems to say
‘Till death do us part’, this is what this happy couple seems to say

Marriage requires due diligence

I was inspired to write this piece based on experiences like the one above and others I have read and heard in relation to the importance of marriage. Organisations and individuals use due diligence as an enquiry tool to get information about entities they would like to engage with for business purposes prior to signing an agreement.

In most cases, until they are satisfied and convinced of their investigations or inquiries, they may not engage in any business activity. Due diligence is often applied in charitable investigations, though it can be legal requirements. The question is, why would due diligence be important in marriage?

This is necessary because many issues encountered in marriages could have been avoided if couples permitted themselves to be accustomed to their partners on key crucial subjects in relationships such as compatibility, agreeableness, attitudes or personalities. Second, divorce rate keeps accumulating because couples after marriage become privy to certain realities about their partners which some are incapable of muddling through, hence ending up in bitter separation.

It is in the best interest of would-be couples to adopt due diligence in addition to any other strategy available to them to know about each other before getting married. This is because once you marry, you are bound by a contract to stay married and it is not an easy process to end it; not to mention the psychological, emotional, financial and other impact it can have on both partners and, especially, children.

Of course, it is impossible to have complete knowledge about each other but at least this tool gives substantial awareness of who you are going to spend the rest of your life with.

Lesson for dating couples

It is better for dating couples to call off a marriage ceremony than to get married and divorce some few years later. You are better off being called names because you cancelled a wedding than to marry and be unhappy because you overlooked certain critical issues that could have been avoided.

It is absolutely deceptive to think you can change your partner after marriage. People do not change their disposition so be guarded. The survival of your marriage depends on your ability to compromise with each other and recognise that it is a union of two imperfect people who have decided to be committed and stand by each other despite the difficulties.

Due diligence is important in many areas not limited to family background, financial standings, future family plans; in terms of whether to have children or not or where you would like to live, religious beliefs, among others.

Engage your family where possible to make the essential enquiries before you finally decide to marry. It is in your interest not to hide any information from your family because when you are affected by any problem in marriage, they would equally be affected.

Employment contract vs matrimonial vows

Before a company appoints someone, it would go through varied processes such as interviewing, referencing, medical examinations and so on. Until they are satisfied with all the processes, needless of how brilliant a candidate may be, they would never change a rule.

The premise here is, companies see an employment contract with an employee as a relationship that is binding by a contract; and, therefore, deems it highly important to get it right the first time. Equally, an employee would find out about how profitable a company is, the future growth or prospects or its reputation before accepting an offer.

In the case of employment, an employee can resign once they give a clear resignation notice. Unless otherwise stated or signed in a contract, no employee is obliged to work their entire life with one organisation; it is a matter of choice and preference.

Marriage is an important milestone in the lives of individuals who embark on it. It is a lifetime commitment in comparison with employer-employee relationship, which can be terminated at any time.

It is absolutely crucial to choose your life partner wisely because marriage can either bring you joy or pain depending on your willingness to make it work. There is nothing wrong with remaining as friends in order to study each other well before dating him or her.

Avoid marrying someone you hardly know or anyone knows. Adhere to family background checks and apply wisdom in choosing a life partner. Always remember to love with care and protect yourself.

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