Funny signs of the times, but after the laughter?
Sometimes I am tempted to believe that if we want to know the true state of education in most places in Ghana, we need not look beyond the signs all around us, whether on signboards, on commercial vehicles or on structures.
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The spectacular mangling of the Queen’s English, the curious spellings and the contorted grammar are on public display everywhere; so much so that one may be forgiven for thinking that our signwriters specialize in getting it wrong.
Even if that were the case, what about those who order the signs and leave the spelling and the grammar to the ‘anything-goes’ signwriters? Obviously, they don’t know any better and so they accept whatever they are presented with.
It could also be argued that the amusing signs provide some comic relief for everybody. But after the laughter?
I presume that people in authority, notably officials in charge of Education Standards, also see them and that they, too, laugh. But what is their thinking, after having had a good laugh? Surely they, unlike the rest of us, can’t just laugh about it and leave it at that?
Last week’s issue of this paper featured on the centre spread (pages) a compilation from the Internet of some of the hilarious signs.
For readers who missed last week’s Mirror, the ‘selection’ included:
- WHO KNOWS TUMOLO, ONLY GOD
- SAVE ME HO GOD
- TO GOD BE THE GROLY
- IN TRUST WE GOD
- THE DEVIL IS LAYER
- STOP TROING RIABASH HERE
- ONCE BEATEN, TWICE SHALL
- NO SHOT CAT TO HEAVEN
- GOOD SEMARLTIN
- UNLESS GOD GYE NYAME CAPIMTERY SHOP
- SHOPLIFTERS WILL BE PROSTITUTED, and,
- HOLYGOES FARE.
However, apart from the Mirror collection, another set has also been circulating on social media for some time:
- LIKING FINGER RESTAURANT, MOTTO: THE LORD IS MY STRANTH
- SNACKS MEAT PILES, EGG ROLL, DO NOT, FISH PILES, PLANTAIN CHEPS, ROSTED MEATS
- 4 BIRD ROOM FLATE FOR SALE
- INTANACIONAL BABER, COME AND CUT YOUR HEAD HERE
- PLATE YOUR HEAD HERE
- WE SELL DOG CHILDRENS, BOYS AND GIRLS, and,
g.VACANCY! A MALE SALESGIRL IS WANTED.
If all of the above are from Ghana, God help Ghana! Equally, if some are from other African countries, God help Africa!
Anyway, one shouldn’t forget that for years, the funny messages on Ghana’s tro-tro vehicles have enjoyed international fame and have featured in many publications and films, and have even been the subject of books.
I doubt that the above were written just to generate laughter. Evidently those who wrote them, and those using them, don’t find anything wrong with the text.
The above may be blamed on poor educational background, but what about signs produced under government contract and supervision, by people who are supposed to be professionals? What about signs on which no doubt colossal amounts of taxpayers’ money have been spent, such as the street naming exercise under the President Mahama administration?
It was certainly a very commendable initiative, but its execution was evidently unbelievably shoddy in many places.
Therefore, I believe that there is the need to draw attention again to the street-naming exercise in the hope that the necessary changes will be effected soon, to complement the President Akufo-Addo Government’s decision to make Accra a continental showpiece.
Thus the issues raised in this space on October 30, 2015 (‘Accra street-naming: any supervision?’) seem to be still relevant. Some of them were:
New street names of no immediately clear connection to the neighbourhood, or its residents, were given to places that had perfectly good names people were used to; with misspellings and misnaming galore!
What was wrong with the old street names? Why didn’t the Accra Metropolitan Assembly simply write the old names on the new, signboards? Why not give names only to roads that had no names?
Yet, ironically, some of the names that have become misnomers were maintained. Is ‘Castle Road’ still appropriate for a route that meanders through Odorna, Adabraka Official Town, past the Holy Spirit Cathedral and by the Osu Cemetery?
If in colonial times when it got that name there was a straight route from Adabraka to the Osu Castle, evidently since then there have been numerous changes obstructing its direct access to the Castle.
Why can’t there be only one part of it that maintains the name ‘Castle Road’ while other segments are renamed, if it’s for historical purposes?
In how many instances were people in the areas consulted about the new name for their street?
And are the abbreviations – such as ‘LP’, ‘LN’, ‘HW’, ‘LK’ and ‘HST’ – understood by all?
My dictionaries tell me that ‘avenue’ usually refers to a wide thoroughfare with trees. Yet, we now have streets named ‘AVENUE’ even when they can’t boast of a single shrub!
If the High Street has to bear the name of the late President, why no uniformity? There are at least three versions, at different points: ‘PROF ATTA MILLS HIGH ST’, ‘JOHN ATTA MILLS HIGH ST’ and ‘JOHN EVANS ATTA MILLS HIGH ST’.
Perhaps the most bewildering is the road apparently named after Prime Minister K. A. Busia. Evidently the namers could not make up their mind whether it’s a ‘highway’ or a ‘high street’.
From the Obetsebi Lamptey roundabout towards the Kaneshie Market, a sign says ‘DR BUSIA HWY’. However, further down, the signs either say ‘DR BUSIA HST’ or ‘DR BUSIA HW’.
However one consolation: at least the Busia name is spelt right, which is not the case regarding the signs with ‘J.A. KUFFOUR AVE’ on them. But maybe that stretch is not named after former President J.A. Kufuor, but rather another person with the same initials!
Were there no guidelines for the Accra street-naming exercise? Was it executed by different contractors and with little or no supervision?
Also, as at now, in 2017, there is still no indication that the new names are to be used by the service providers, such as the Ghana Water Company, Electricity Company and the State Housing Company.
Notably, although others too pointed out the Accra street-naming errors, those signboards are still in place as far as I can tell.
But I could be mistaken and the embarrassing, questionable street signs are being replaced. If so, I would be more than happy to be corrected.